Deliver Us From Swedish Furniture

So, you have just signed up for your acting lessons and headed to Minnesota, what else do you need for your fun night out? Ah yes some protection, and what better protection could you want than condoms that are Too Tough to Die (break!) before you Blitzkreig Bob? That’s right, Ramones Condoms!!! This does also explain one thing - why The Ramones would not want to be a Pinhead no more

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So, still annoyed that winter refuses to let go and you are stuck outside, freezing cold to have a smoke? Well there is another way now - move to Minnesota and start acting. You look confused, well from what I read here, if you are in a theater production and you need to act that you are smoking, then you are allowed to smoke inside. So many bars around the Twin Cities are holding ‘Theater Nights’ where everyone in the place is designated an actor and hence they can smoke, which seems to work well -

Lisa Anderson, owner of Mike’s Uptown bar in Hill City, said that last Saturday she staged a “theater night” and packed in four times the usual crowd that has come in since the smoking ban took effect.

Nice! The other thing to remember is that, according to the book The Undercover Economist the best way to spot women that are likely to er, well let’s leave it to Family Guy’s subtle grasp of the English language to get this subtle and sophisticated point across, ‘If she smokes - she pokes’. Just remember your Rubber Rubber Hey?

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I was sent this by a friend of mine with the heading ‘bless’….I just read it looking at my dog staring up at me with her tongue lolling out of the side of her mouth and thought ‘you really are no fun are you?’ The only tricks she can manage (beside the aforementioned staring with tongue lolling) is a quick bark to go out and the ability to suddenly hear something in the distance and fly off my lap leaving some large claw marks across my legs….not quite the same thing is it?

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